Dear Julian,

I’m sorry. I can say no more, because there is no more to say. I’ve always been wrong with you, I’ve never given you the love you deserve.

Perhaps because I wasn’t ready, or because I’ve never have my father. Perhaps I didn’t understand how important I was for you, because you’ve never been important for me. And I’m sorry.

Now I understand: you are the perfect son, and you’re right when you say you don’t want to be like me. For this reason you haven't got married yet, because you’re not ready and you don't wanna make my same mistakes. You are so wise and strong… I think you’re better than me and therefore you’d be able to forgive me.

But if you don’t do that… I’ll understand.

Here I’m ok, but everyday I miss you, and I regret all the time I’ve never spent with you, with my little boy. I think you’ve done a good work, being a musician. I'm very proud of you.

How is it here? A big and white cloud. It’s the only thing I see. I don’t want to go out, I’m afraid to meet someone. I saw George last week… well, I suppose it was last week: there is no time, here. George was very happy, and me too. But seeing him… It was a mistake: in that moment I rembered all my life, everything I have done... and I though of you, and of what you’d think about me. Not nice things, I suppose.

How is Mum? And Paul? Ringo? Sean? You are friends, aren’t you? I’m afraid to ask you about Yoko. She’s not been so kind, I know. I don’t wanna ask you to forgive her, but just… to forgive me. I know it’s difficult and I wouldn’t deserve it. But I need it, I wish your forgiveness.

I hope you’ll do.

See you, Julian. Don’t make it bad… Keep imagine, lovely boy.

With love,

your father John.